Orange Flowers

If Something Should Happen To Us

You know how they say “if you don’t want it to rain, carry an umbrella”. Well, this post is our umbrella and the rain is, um… some kind of tragic accident.

(Note to Mom: You probably shouldn’t read this post).

I know I keep telling you all it’s perfectly safe to go travelling around the world on a bike, but it’s really hard not to think about the risky side when every second person warns you to be careful out there. Also, we are by no means still young enough to believe in our own immortality.

So, just to ward off bad juju in the same way an umbrella wards off rain, here’s a list of things you should under no circumstances do if something bad should happen to us on our trip.

No PDM (Public Displays of Mourning)

If we should, you know, kick it on our trip, please don’t post a soppy picture of us on your Facebook feed. And if you do, which you won’t, please don’t add some quote about how we’re flying with the angels now or that God is holding us in the palm of his hand.

We don’t believe in angels, or God, or public mourning via social media. If something should happen, we’ll be churned up by the worms and returned to the earth, which is right where we would want to be.

No Excuses

If something bad should happen to us on our adventure, please don’t use it as yet another excuse to ignore your own dreams. Don’t let it add to the mountain of fear that’s already keeping you from having any fun.

Wouldn’t you rather live a little before it’s time to go?

No Flowers

If the worst should come to pass, don’t send flowers or sympathy cards.

Instead, use that money to support your local bicycling organisation. Or better yet, buy your own bike and get out on the streets. With more bikes on the road, our governments will give more support to bike lanes, policies, and campaigns to help keep us safe.

No Xenophobia

If catastrophe should strike, don’t use it as an excuse to deride another country’s traffic, culture, or infrastructure.

Well, that never would have happened if those Khazakstanis could keep their horses under control!

Crazy things happen everywhere, including right in your neighborhood. If you don’t believe me, check the local news some time.

No Frowns

If something happens to us out on the road, don’t be sad. Be happy that we got a chance to do something extraordinary. Throw a party, celebrate life, and truly live.

Do it for us.  

Got a few more minutes? Read these posts.

Mean DogI’m So Not Afraid of That
Things you might think we’d be afraid of, and why we’re not
Covered WagonThe Only Thing We Have To Fear
Things I genuinely am afraid will happen on our trip

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4 Comments

  1. ann says:

    there’s the risks of doing things. and the risks of not doing them.

    how do you feel about “they died doing what they loved doing most”?

    ps hilarious post.

    • Jane says:

      Well, if there’s one thing I know from attending funerals, it’s that you can’t avoid cliches completely when you die, so I guess that one will have to do for us. So glad you saw the humour in that post – I was worried it was just plain morbid and depressing.

  2. Sara says:

    You guys are so amazing. Jane, your posts always make me laugh out loud. You’ve always been one of the funniest and brightest women I’ve known. Enjoy your trip, and the time spent with each other. It’s an inspiring venture, to be sure. It’s been a long, long time, but memories of you both bring a smile to my face. Thanks for that :) Have fun!!! xo

    • Jane says:

      Awww. Thank you! I’m glad *someone* gets my sense of humour. Stephen and I are always interested in what you’re up to as well, and still feel connected to you through the magic of Facebook. So glad you’re doing so well – maybe we can see each in person one of these days.