Nina the chimpanzee Photo by Afrikaforce

Latest Green News: December 16

Photo by Afrikaforce

It’s official. Politicians hate the environment. Even ones who pretended to like it when they were getting elected a few years back are all, “yeah, I might give the go-ahead for the Keystone XL pipeline any day now”. At this rate, Obama is going to flip-flop his way right out of the White House. Newt and Mitt are also in the hate the environment corner this week, as are some 100 beluga whales, who are hoping global warming would hurry up and warm. Read on for details…

Latest Green News That Made Me Go Arrrrgh
I have been much shamed by my countries of citizenship this week. First, British PM David Cameron tanked the whole EU thing and then Canada drops out of Kyoto leaving them open to being dissed by more eco-friendly countries, like China. It’s well deserved, too, since apparently Canada has been slacking for decades when it come to enforcing its environmental protection laws. In the last 20 years, the amount Canada has collected for environmental infractions does not even match the overdue fines the Toronto public library collects in a year. So either Torontonians are hanging onto their borrowed copies of Pride & Prejudice for waaaay too long, or Canada is tired of being known as ‘that beautiful country with all the nature’.

Another shudder-inducing piece of news this week is that Monsanto came in at number 29 on Glassdoor’s 2012 Best Places To Work – Employees’ Choice Awards. Voted on by regular folk, who love working at a company, which, among other things, is responsible for the suicides of thousands of Indian cotton farmers. On the upside, I hear the Monsanto free employee snack program is to die for.

Finally, it turns out that Newt Gingrich was sane for five minutes back in 2008. It’s true. He admitted that climate change was a problem and that we should do something about it. Gasp. Then he realized that people would hate him for that. And now Mitt and Newt are falling all over themselves to be the one to hate the environment the most. This seems to be a good time to remind everyone how environmental projects create jobs.

Latest Green News That Made Me Go Meh
Speaking of people who hate the environment, much rage is expected now that the EPA has (after 20 years) finally passed a law to limit the amount of mercury, arsenic and other toxins that can be blasted into the air from power plants. Hurrah? I mean, why the f wasn’t this done 20 years ago and what kind of person would oppose this kind of thing? Assholes, that’s who.

Beluga whales are the opposite of assholes, so it’s super-sad that around 100 of them got trapped in the polar ice of the Bering Sea (that’s in Russia, Sarah Palin, maybe you can see them from your kitchen window). On the other hand, it’s heartwarming to see Russians rushin’ (ha ha) to save these little (relative to say, a school bus) guys. It also begs the question, would you rather be trapped in polar sea ice or in a tiny pool at Sea World?

Latest Green News That Made Me Go Rah!
Ding dong, chimp research is dead! Sort of. Acutally, experiments will be allowed to continue if strict conditions are met. Still, this means around 1,000 chimps are set to gain their “freedom”. The question is, where will the chimps end up?

You must have an opinion when it comes to Mitt, Newt, Barack, and their almost total disregard for the world we live in! Share it below.

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